Quotes from The World of Possibility

Ed: Imagine me back in high school looking at one of those crystal balls and seeing that one day Ed Stevens would be kissing Carol Vessey. What would you have said?
Mike: Faulty ball.
Ed: Exactly.

Nick: After all the ups and downs and ins and outs we've had over the years, there are only two things I'm sure of.
Carol: What?
Nick: Number one, I'm a self-centered self-absorbed horse's ass and probably always will be.
Carol: Ah.
Nick: Actually, I knew that one before I met you.
Carol: Oh, well, okay. And number two?
Nick: I am in love with you. Deep... total... helpless.

Ed: Nancy, I do not want to think about Liz. And do you know why? Because Liz slept with a mailman, and when my wife sleeps with a mailman, I try not to think about it. This is just a little policy of mine.

Phil: Hey, what do you think of these bad boys.
Ed: Phil, those are salt and pepper shakers. Salt and pepper shakers by definition cannot be bad boys.

Stan: Welcome to the wonderful world of possibility!

Ed: Okay. I'm going to go... eat... a cookie. Y'know, so you can do it.
Mike: Do what? Have sex?
Ed: Yep.
Mike: It's not a leap year, is it, honey?
Nancy: That was funny for you to say.

Stan: In the old days we would have settled things like this with a baseball bat and a sock full of quarters.

Ed: I have a very distinct staff.

Ed: Without the world of possibility, what do we have left?

Judge: Bring on the dancing turkey.

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