3rd Season
2002-2003

#1 Human Nature
#2 Miss Stuckeyville
#3 The Road
#4 Charlotte & Wilbur
#5 The Divorce
#6 May the Best Man Win
#7 The Wedding
#8 Trapped
#9 Makeovers
#10 Neighbors
#11 Frankie
#12 Partners
#13 Hyenas & Wildebeests
#14 The Case
#15 Blip
#16 Good Advice
#17 Captain Lucidity
#18 Business as Usual
#19 Babysitting
#20 Second Chances
#21 The Movie
#22 The Decision

Other seasons
1 | 2 | 3 | 4


#1 Human Nature: Aired Wednesday, September 25, 2002

Kenny quits the bowling alley and Ed hires a spitfire in a wheelchair named Eli and puts him in charge over Phil. Carol is furious with Ed about his kissing her, but admits she didn't say yes when Dennis proposed over the summer. Dennis loses patience with Carol and decides to leave town, but Carol stops him by suggesting they get married. Mike loses $3,000 in a betting scam, and Ed finds himself blackmailed into representing the psychologist that took advantage of Mike.

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#2 Miss Stuckeyville: Aired Wednesday, October 2, 2002

Carol gets up the guts and finally tells Ed she's engaged. At first, Ed is in denial, and then he starts trying to convince Carol that Dennis is just another in a long line of dicks that she's dated and she shouldn't marry him. Mark and Diane make a deal: she'll sign up for the Miss Stuckeyville pageant if he goes on a diet. Mark sticks to his diet for two days, but what's even harder for him is watching Diane realize that she's pretty and flirt with the pageant photographer. Ed tries to convince Diane to drop out, theorizing that it's the pageant (Carol was a Miss Stuckeyville herself) that made Carol think she has nothing but beauty to offer a man. Carol watches what the pageant does to Diane and, as a judge, gives Diane a zero to get her out of it. Mark fears that Diane is tired of dating "the fat kid," but Diane assures him she just wanted him to lose weight for his health. Phil refuses to acknowledge Eli's leadership, and sets up a petting zoo in the bowling alley to get Eli fired.

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#3 The Road: Aired Wednesday, October 9, 2002

Ed, frustrated with watching Carol and Dennis plan their wedding, asks a stranger who has been parking a trailer in Stuckeybowl's parking lot if he can go on the road with him. Ed goes on the road with the quiet stranger, Frank, and realizes that that's not the way to find happiness. He's back in Stuckeyville after 36 hours. Meanwhile, Carol and Dennis are on the rocky road of wedding planning, and Carol suspects that Dennis is bullying her into doing things his way, when on the surface, he is nothing but nice and rational about everything. Phil decides that Eli only beats him at basketball because of Eli's wheelchair, so Phil challenges Eli to a game in which Phil is also in a chair... that's ten feet high... with someone pushing him. Nancy auditions to be a guidance counselor at the high school and Dennis puts her up against a student named Johnny who refuses to go to class. Nancy tries every approach she can think of to get the kid to go to class, but when she fails, Dennis gives her the job anyway, because all he wanted was for her to realize how difficult it would be.
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#4 Charlotte & Wilbur: Aired Wednesday, October 16, 2002

For some reason, Carol hasn't yet told her dad, Richard, about Dennis or the fact that she's engaged. When she finally tells him on his birthday, Richard is not so pleased. Carol goes to his house to talk to him about it, and finds out that Richard actually got remarried a year ago and didn't tell her about it. Richard's new wife, Rita, tells Carol about a biopsy Richard had on a possibly cancerous polyp, and Carol confronts her dad about how they never really share the difficult things in their lives. Carol accompanies her dad to the doctor, where they find out he'll be just fine, and Richard buys Carol a new copy of Charlotte's Web, because he changed the ending to a happy one in the copy he gave her as a child. Ed competes for Eli in a jitterbug contest to bring down Eli's old rival, but tries a last minute flip with his unprepared partner and ruins it. Out of fear of standardized testing, Warren decides to protest the SATs, but he finally gets the courage he needs to take the test from talking with Eli. Shirley premieres deep fried pie at Stuckeybowl.

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#5 The Divorce: Aired Wednesday, October 30, 2002

Ed is approached by two popular morning radio DJs, Curtis and Desmond, to look over a contract for their new "Best of" CD. What Ed doesn't realize is that the DJs have been fighting among themselves more and more often, and they finally decide they should break up. They ask Ed to help them decide who gets to take which "radio bit" with them, but Ed secretly hopes he'll get the DJs to stay together. Carol takes the opportunity to write an article for the local newspaper on the DJs' breakup, even though Ed begs her not to. Carol's article is the catalyst for the final breakup, and even though Ed tries to trick the two DJs into reconciling at a fake event at Stuckeybowl, he can't change their minds. Meanwhile, Ed has been being very cold towards Carol, and finally Molly lectures him on it and he and Carol reconcile after he brings her white roses. Nancy suggests to Mike that they do some preventative marriage counseling, and he reluctantly agrees. The counselor makes them do communication exercises that end up creating arguments that weren't there, and Mike and Nancy solve their arguments by deciding to ignore their counselor.

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#6 May the Best Man Win: Aired Wednesday, November 6, 2002

Jennifer, Ed's old to-do-list flame, comes back into his life and tricks Ed into spending time with her by making up a complaint about her landlord. Molly and Nancy break into Carol's house to steal pictures to make a slide show for the engagement party. Molly starts to worry that, now that Carol is getting married, she's going to lose her best friend. Dennis doesn't want Ed at the wedding, but when Carol refuses to disinvite him, Dennis sarcastically asks Ed to be his best man. Ed sarcastically accepts, and then throws Dennis a blow-out bachelor party. Dennis and Ed are both surprised when they both have a good time at the party, and end up making a vague peace, but the next time they're both around Carol they're back to throwing daggers at each other. Ed wants to crush Dennis with a toast at the engagement party, but ends up taking the high road and wishing Carol and Dennis much happiness. Carol is relieved that her future husband and her best friend might be able to get along. Ed turns to Jennifer for comfort. Phil tries to become a new man and responsible bowling alley employee, but planning the bachelor party derails him back into his slothful self.

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#7 The Wedding: Aired Wednesday, November 13, 2002

The week before Carol's wedding, Carol starts to have second thoughts and Dennis starts to realize that he might not be the right man for Carol. Carol's little sister, Stella, comes into town, and ends up bonding with Warren when they write a song for Carol together. Stella offers to relieve Warren of his virginity, but Warren tells her he doesn't want a one-night stand. Jennifer convinces Ed that he should attend Carol's wedding, and then realizes that what he should really do is break it up. Ed dons a white suit and rents a horse to make a dramatic entrance at Carol's wedding, but his crazy horse takes him in the wrong direction and he misses it entirely. During the vows, Dennis notices Carol looking around the church for Ed and calls off the wedding at the last minute. Dennis tells Carol she's in love with Ed even though Carol insists she's in love with Dennis.

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#8 Trapped: Aired Wednesday, November 20, 2002

Jennifer suggests to Ed that they vacation to Africa together, but when it's clear he can't stop thinking about Carol, Jennifer refuses to be second fiddle and takes off. Mike is sick of Ed talking about Carol and not doing anything. Nancy and Molly find it hard to cheer Carol up. Ed tries to talk to Carol, but she gets mad at him for continually interfering in her life. Finally, their friends lock Carol and Ed in Stuckeybowl to get them to work out their differences. Guarding the back door of the bowling alley, Phil tries to encourage Eli to ask out a pretty customer, Vivian, while they play a vicious game of Scrabble. Guarding the front door of the bowling alley, Mike tries hard to entertain Nancy and Molly so they won't leave him there alone. Ed and Carol war inside, and then start to make up, and then are finally honest with each other. Ed finally tells Carol why he wasn't at her wedding, and Carol tells Ed why Dennis left her at the altar. Carol loves the way Ed pursues her constantly, and yet hates it, because she doesn't feel like she deserves it. When a teary Carol tries to kiss Ed, Ed stops her and tells her he's done. Their friends finally let them out and they leave, separate and sullen.

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#9 Makeovers: Aired Wednesday, December 11, 2002

Mark's dad has a heart attack and Mark has to fill in for him as Santa Claus at the Stuckeybowl Santaland that Eli planned. Mark goes for a checkup and Dr. Mike Burton tells him to consider gastric bypass surgery. A concerned Warren finds out about this and also urges Mark to do the surgery, but Mark says he'll cut down his eating on his own. Finally, as Mark watches his dad sneak pepperoni just a few days after a heart attack, he realizes that he has to take action, so he talks to Mike about the surgery. Ed breaks through the awkwardness with Carol by throwing her over his shoulder and walking down the street with her. Ed's brother Lloyd comes to town and is prosecuted for being part of a pyramind scheme involving selling makeup for men. Ed doesn't believe his brother when Lloyd swears he didn't know about the pyramid scheme, but Ed finds out later from the prosecutor that Lloyd was completely innocent.

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#10 Neighbors: Aired Wednesday, December 18, 2002

Ed is horrified when a new lawyer, Mr. Fonseca, blows into town and tries to get the good citizens of Stuckeyville to sue each other over stupid little things. Mike is disappointed when his favorite event of the year, the Recliner Rally, is cancelled because the sponsor is afraid of getting sued if someone gets hurt. Ed talks Mike into getting "stuck" in a storm drain so that the people of Stuckeyville will rally together to get him out. While the plan isn't a raging success, it at least gets Ed's case of a gazebo shading a neighbor's lawn dropped. Phil tries to fatten up and slim down so that he can be like Jared of Subway Sandwich fame and become the spokesperson for a local sub shop. Eli helps Phil with a convincing fat suit, but Phil still doesn't get the job. Carol talks Molly into applying for the open position of principal of Stuckeyville High, and while Molly initially fights her on it, after another candidate blatantly steals Molly's platform, she decides to go for it. Molly becomes the new principal of Stuckeyville High.

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#11 Frankie: Aired Wednesday, January 8, 2003

Ed represents a high school football player who was injured during a game, but claims that he was attacked because he stole another player's girlfriend and his injury is not just a normal football accident. A female law school graduate named Frankie moves to Stuckeyville with her architect boyfriend and decides that she wants to join Ed's law firm. Even though he tells her he's not hiring, she helps him out with his football player case, eventually giving him the key to the win. He is charmed by her personality as well as her lawyering skills, and ends up offering her a job. Molly tries hard to be the coolest principal of Stuckeyville High ever, but realizes that sometimes she has to be a rule enforcer too. Warren and Diane recruit Eli in their efforts to cook a sumptuous last meal for Mark before he gets his gastric bypass surgery.

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#12 Partners: Aired Wednesday, January 15, 2003

Frankie and Ed realize that they work quite well together when they represent a man whose sister insists on putting an ad in the local Pennysaver declaring him a homosexual. Mike and Dr. Jerome go to war trying to steal each other's patients until Mike realizes that Dr. Jerome is getting too old to treat all of his patients, and the elderly man just wants Mike to come back to his practice to help him. Mike agrees to come back, but as a full partner, not a subordinate. Dr. Jerome reluctantly agrees. Carol decides to try dating against her type, and goes out with a nerdy comptroller named Toby. Carol tries hard to like the nice man, but just can't get excited about his murder mystery party and his jigsaw puzzle hobby.

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#13 Hyenas & Wildebeests: Aired Wednesday, January 22, 2003

Carol gets sued because she writes a bad review for a restaurant owned by an old class bully from high school. The bully, Rich, knows that Carol and Molly are friends, and thinks that Carol is trying to get back at him for a prank he played on Molly in school. Ed and Frankie defend Carol successfully, but Molly is shocked when she learns that Carol was one of the popular kids who laughed from the bushes when Rich humiliated her many years ago. Molly, as principal, tries to help a geeky student, Ryan, who is constantly being tortured by his peers. Although Ryan's father, Sean, insists that the bullies be punished, Molly instead hatches a scheme to make the loser kid look cool. When his kid comes home from school happy for the first time, Sean apologizes to Molly. Molly finds that Sean, who turns out to be a widowed fireman, has piqued her interest. Phil tries to attract a younger crowd to the bowling alley by creating Danger Bowling, with fire and sand pits. Ed orders him to put it back to normal when their older regular customers are driven away.

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#14 The Case: Aired Wednesday, February 5, 2003

One of Eli's friends, a guy named Danny, is accused of killing his best friend, Jeff, by toppling over a statue outside a restaurant while Jeff was climbing it. Ed is hesitant to take on a murder case, but when Eli, Carol, and, most of all, Frankie say that they have faith in him, he decides to give it his best shot. The case looks bad when they find out that Jeff was having an affair with Danny's wife, and that there's a witness that saw Danny push the statue over, but Ed, with help and support from Frankie, perseveres and gets Danny the correct verdict of innocent. Sean Nowell approaches Molly for help with communicating with his nerdy son, Ryan. Molly comes up with a couple of plans that backfire, but she and Sean end up getting to spend some more time together, and Ryan eventually gives his dad a chance to be his friend.

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#15 Blip: Aired Wednesday, February 12, 2003

As Valentine's Day draws near, Frankie's boyfriend Leon takes a job in Houston and Carol's sister Stella comes to town followed by the boyfriend she just dumped in Boston. Stella takes her famous painter boyfriend, Peter, back, but quickly regrets it when he goes back to ignoring her for his art. Warren makes a romantic play to get Stella back on Valentine's Day by playing Cupid outside her window, and Stella dumps Peter and gives Warren another chance to lose his virginity. Ed, after taking a silly longevity test and finding out he'll die at age 83, worries about what kind of legacy he's going to leave behind, especially when Peter asks for Ed's help in making sure his paintings last forever. Ed learns that Peter's art makes him miss out on life, and he ends up taking a page out of his great-grandfather's book and making sure that he just enjoys life for what it is. Phil and Eli try to write a new happy birthday song. Nancy wants to buy one of Peter's paintings, so Mike paints his own and tries to pass it off as one of Peter's. Frankie breaks up with Leon and stays in Stuckeyville, and Carol and Molly wonder how long it will take for her and Ed to get together. Mark has already lost 96 pounds.

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#16 Good Advice: Aired Wednesday, February 19, 2003

Frankie defends Ed when Ed gets sued by a man he rescued from a burning car. Ed urges Frankie not to go visit Leon in Houston when Leon sends her a plane ticket. Carol points out to Ed that he gave Frankie that advice because he likes her. Even though Frankie loses Ed's case, he rewards her with her favorite drive-in movie. Molly and her fireman, Sean, hit a stumbling block in their blossoming relationship when Sean's son Ryan starts acting out. Stella feels overly mothered by Carol, who tries to help her younger sister form a life plan. After their one night together, Warren thinks Stella is his girlfriend, but she tells him he's wrong. She can't resist him, however, when she finds him outside in the cold blasting a boom box for her.

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#17 Captain Lucidity: Aired Wednesday, February 26, 2003

Ed and Frankie represent the owner of the Smiling Goat, who is suing a nearby diner for stealing his potato skins which he calls Skin-taculars. While all his friends ask him what he's going to do about Frankie, Ed continues to deny that there's anything going on with his employee and discovers lucid dreaming. After a couple nights of trying, Ed finally has a lucid dream, and does lots of wacky stuff with no consquences. He also learns that he puts women on a pedestal and is afraid to go after his fantasy women because he fears disappointment. Ed figures out that he could be happy in a real relationship with Frankie, even though he has trouble letting go of the fantasy of Carol. Ed, after waking from his lucid dream, has an honest conversation with Frankie which ends in a passionate kiss.

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#18 Business as Usual: Aired Wednesday, March 5, 2003

After a short awkwardness, Ed and Frankie happily fall into bed together, but as they work on their new case, the tension between them grows. Ed and Frankie help a woman who, while in law school, signed a contract saying she would marry a male friend of hers if they weren't married to other people by the time she was 35. Ed and Frankie more or less win their case, but almost destroy their professional relationship. The decide they should just be co-workers, but still can't manage to keep their hands off each other. Mike and Dr. Jerome battle over whose name is bigger on their new joint practice sign. Toby tries to help with executive couples counseling, but its Nancy's bullying that really gets the two irascible doctors in line. Mark learns that his obese classmate, Jimmy, has decided to undergo gastric bypass surgery after watching how much weight Mark lost. Mark feels incredibly responsible when Jimmy's surgery has complications, and Diane does her best to comfort him and remind him the Jimmy knew his own risks.

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#19 Babysitting: Aired Wednesday, March 12, 2003

While Frankie is out of town, Ed volunteers to babysit Sarah for a weekend so Mike and Nancy can go away to a bed and breakfast. Ed soon realizes he's in over his head with a three-year-old girl, and calls Carol for help. Together, they successfully parent the girl for the weekend, and even engineer the perfect revenge for a snub from another child's mom. Carol admits she's feels a little bit weird about Ed dating Frankie. Mike and Nancy have a mostly miserable time at the bed and breakfast due to its owner, Linda, who keeps planning activities and sing-a-longs for them like they're in summer camp. Phil tries to make a news story about his "ebony and ivory" friendship with Eli, but only draws attention from the newspaper to Eli's story of dealing with his paralysis.

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#20 Second Chances: Aired Friday, March 28, 2003

Frankie learns about Ed's past with Carol, and all of his many romantic gestures, and is understandably a little insecure. Carol goes out on a date with a new history teacher at school who is great, but all it does is make her realize that she really wants Ed. Carol struggles with the right way to tell Ed how she feels, while Ed decides that maybe he and Carol shouldn't be quite so close, because they might be standing in the way of each other's happiness. Frankie tries to show Ed how romantic she can be, but it's Carol that brings Ed flowers in a suit of armor. Eli is horrified when the new owner of his old fish and chips shop comes to him for help in saving the business. With help from Ed and gang, Eli brings the shop back to its former glory, and at the same time is reminded of his own life before the accident that paralyzed his legs. Mike gets a tape on how to be a better lover, and Nancy is very appreciative of his new moves in bed, but after a week, Mike decides his new maneuvers are too much work and he goes back to the "old way."

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#21 The Movie: Aired Friday, April 4, 2003

Ed tells Carol that what she thinks she's feeling isn't real, and leaves her in her suit of armor in front of the bowling alley. As Ed helps a local shoe salesman achieve his dream of making a movie, Carol continues to pursue Ed. Frankie gets more and more uncomfortable, and Ed asks Carol to back off and stop messing with his life. Frankie finally gets fed up and goes to Houston to see Leon, while Carol finally gets the message and decides to leave Ed alone. When Carol shows Molly some of the old entries in her journal, Molly "borrows" the journal and reads them to Ed so that he can know how Carol has felt about him all along. Warren is inconsolable when Stella tells him that she's moving back to Boston. Ed forces Mike to grow a moustache.

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#22 The Decision: Aired Friday, April 11, 2003

With his newfound knowledge, Ed is in a quandary about his choice between his romantic interests. Carol says she will await his decision, while Frankie tells him that she's considering going back to her old boyfriend unless Ed gives her a reason not to. Ed decides to choose Frankie, but in looking for Carol to tell her about his decision, he remembers all the wonderful times they've had over the last three years and realizes that he loves her. Ed and Carol share an ecstatic kiss. Mike finds himself with the opportunity to hook up with a cute blonde college co-ed, but realizes that it wouldn't be worth risking his marriage. Phil and Shirley give Eli the push that he needs to jump back into the dating game at Stuckeybowl's 75th anniversary party.

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Other seasons
1 | 2 | 3 | 4